• Nikki Van Ekeren

Why Not Be The Person That You Know You Are?


I have found that a good inner conversation begins with a question. The juiciest of answers can emerge when you ask yourself questions and wait for the answers.


I propose we start by asking “why not?”


***

“why not”

why not reach down deep

and gather the courage to

speak for up yourself

for the first time?

why not share those words

from the heart

with a friend or a loved one?

why not limit spending time

with those who hurt you or bring you down?

why not ask for

what you really want?


why not?


we seek approval,

so we pander.

we want to be seen

in a certain light,

so we change who we are.

we crave attention,

so we confuse drama for love.

how do we

create the inner confidence

to emerge as our true self?


why not applaud those

amongst us

who have done the inner work

to allow their bright lights to shine?

why not open up

to our truth

and let this guide us?

why not create new habits

that foster and cultivate happiness?

why not be the person

that we know we are?


why not?


***

Before I asked myself these questions, I used to think that success and happiness were meant for everyone else but me. I thought that I had to share my part of joy with others before feeling it. I thought joy, confidence and success were meant for “them.”


I think I began to integrate this mentality into my psyche after some instances of bullying in middle school. I did not have the words to stand up for myself, so I just started to believe that others were more important than me. I felt awkward and uncool, so this fed my insecurities.


When you do not have the right words in your heart, it is difficult to speak up for yourself.


I went through some challenging years as a teenager, as most of us do. but, when I stepped onto my college campus, I got the inner calling to let this all go. it was a fresh start. I was learning how to find my own voice. I decided that I mattered.


I was not going to feel smaller than anyone and decided to be seen.

It was a decision... a “why not” decision.


Why not become the person that i always wanted to be?


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© 2020 Nikki Van Ekeren