I love to write about what I observe in life - preferably the emotions and feelings present in myself and in others. This daily habit has transitioned from journaling to writing personal poetry to currently writing my third book of poems.
I find myself creating a road map in real time on how to experience and get to the other side of emotional discomfort. I am learning that it is all about being able to sit with this pain and then let it change you. The results are indeed magical.
After a decade of writing and observing, I am able to document significant change in myself. I am able to watch myself grow - despite myself. The old me wants to stick around, but the newer version of me is the boss. She is literally running the show. She wants to rise up in every situation and not allow childhood pain or bad patterns and habits to blind me.
Growth is inevitable when we admit our truth. It hurts like hell, but it always works to invigorate our potential. I wrote this poem about the truth.
“as the truth spills out”
i used to hide my eyes and ears
from the truth.
i did not know that
when the truth reveals itself,
there is no judgement.
the truth has no sharp edges,
for it is like water
that rushes over everything it touches.
the terrain of one’s psyche
will be forever changed
when the truth floods its walls.
the truth has no desire
to make anyone happy
or enable one’s uneducated decisions.
it exists to inform.
it penetrates when one is ready to hear it.
when the truth is experienced,
it strengthens all who listen.
one may wait decades to have
the ability to receive their truth.
take no judgement in this.
the soil of your mind
needed to be tended to.
once you’ve heard the truth,
let it soak in.
share it.
bask in it.
it is your gift.
you do not need to hide any longer.
I found that I was hiding from the strength and power I felt inside because I was afraid that this part of me was not lovable. I was circling around my gifts allowing emotional discomfort to be the drama that I focused on.
When you do not know your truth, drama can feel satisfying. As humans we want to tackle and solve problems. So, I was solving the drama that i was creating. This cycle was on a loop.
As I mentioned above, the truth does not hurt. It is the truth; therefore it can only empower. The emotions attached to hiding from the truth are what actually hurt.
Open up to your truth. Sit with it. Begin to enjoy the relief this brings.